Saturday, January 26, 2008

Shavua Tov!

I try to make sure that every Shabbos is the best Shabbos ever. Even if last Shabbos was fantastic, the next can be better. So, that's my goal every Shabbos. This Shabbos was truly fantastic. I have really felt the need for help, and I asked for it in a yahoo group for orthodox conversion. The woman who runs the group passed my information on to a woman in the community who may be able to help. Right before Shabbos, she e-mailed me and invited me to a meal. I was super busy on Friday, but called her when I had a moment and ended up leaving a message saying that I couldn't make it. However, I felt so happy that she actually emailed me. Someone in the community is willing to talk to me, and might be able to help me. Maybe I will be able to find some direction.

The reason I could not go, though, was because I was having dinner at Rabbi Haine's (the Rabbi who I met with a while ago). He and his wife are wonderfully kind their house was so much fun. Lots of people from my home town were there, and although I didn't know them then, I know them now and we just laughed and chatted. Afterwards, I went to Rabbi Fabio's house and chatted with them. A girl my age who does not live in the eruv was staying with me, and when I got back to my apartment, she was already there. We stayed up and talked about the various books I have learned and need to learn, why I am converting, and why she's considering teshuva. We went to sleep way too late and arrived at shul a bit late. However, unlike last week, at kiddush, so many people were there, and it was a nice feeling compared to last week. After Shabbos, I went to eat at my favorite mechanic's house. He's an ex-wrestler who is BT and now lives in the community. He invited me and all of my friends to his house, and we had a really enjoyable time. It was nice because I got to experience Shabbos in a new way. He isn't FFB, and he is divorced, so we got to hear about what made him return and how he perceives Judaism. After that, I went to have third meal at this wonderful lady's house whom I had met at shul on Friday night. When we got there, everyone (she and her daughter's and some other girls) left to go to the wonderful home of another family. We took a shortcut and traveled through the woods which was tons of fun.

Once we got there, we sang and debated about feminism and ate and talked. The new person I met asked me if I could read Hebrew. I told her I was trying, but was not really good at it yet. She offered to teach me Hebrew if I would teach her how to do legal research online. (She's an attorney, and figured it would help.) She also invited me to be her adopted daughter for the night so I could go to the Mother-daughter dance. I have not told her I'm converting, but I plan to tell her as soon as she calls me (hopefully that will be tomorrow).

I felt like I had been fighting so hard and finally, I've had a break through. Every night, I pray so hard. Sometimes, I've wondered if God won't listen to my prayers because I'm not Jewish, but then things like this happen and I know that He does.

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